Wednesday, 16 December 2009

feeling the death-the hot red liquid

She said “good bye!!!” to him, as she did every morning, like this, with a big smile on her face, and a happy-energetic, even in such early times of morning, voice singing… Then turning back, she opened the door and got out of the car. She was bemused, however, she didn’t show her feelings , as usual. Going around the line between being awake and asleep, with a hard struggle, she had forced herself to finally wake up that morning and set off. That time was the time to leave him and take another bus. There they had just come to the crossroad where she said her “good bye”s every morning.

She started walking to cross the road, deep in thought , looking for something in her bag. But there was a truck coming towards her. Only a screechy horn could she hear and only sharp headlights could she see lastly. Then, she was just like lying high above the clouds , but somewhere behind, something was to appear, like a soft breeze, warm breeze, no, hot breeze….blowing upon her face, near her lips, trying to get inside her, through the rest of her body, starting with her brain, across her throat and down to her organs… Or was it just trying to get out? Was the hell inside her?

She was burning inside… And as the hot red liquid came out ,surrounding her body, in the ways of long lines, she felt hotter and hotter. With painful aches in her body, she tried to touch the hot red liquid… But her skull was smashed, as if it would fall to pieces… She couldn’t dare to move. Then she could clearly feel everything. The hell was in her skull, where her brain was bubbling. The frames coming to her eyes, everywhere went red and more red. Only a newborn, light blue sky could she recognize… Getting unconscious, her eyes let the flames go out, and then, they were, too, in all that hot red liquid. Trying hard to cling to life, the natural desire to live as long as possible, her body endured more a few minutes… Endless pains… The hot red liquid… burning..the flames… And the clock of her struck once more,' now time to go'… Something glided up out of her body, through the first lights of the day in the sky, leaving her peaceful and that time, cold. Then she seemed like a stone. As the hot red liquid made its way onto her body, which was about to be frozen on that shinny but frosty winter morning , and out of the road, she got rid of her pains, and the relaxing cold took the place of the hell inside her… A song background…

“Hello..Goodbye…
Higher you fly in to the world ….
I can see you fly away
I can see the sun upon your face
I can feel your heart and I can hear you cry
And as I fall apart , I learn to fly….”

It was the last “good bye” to him from her…. She was just gone for her longest journey… But that time , it would last more and more than any others….And there was her first “hello” to the lives above the clouds…..

1 comment:

  1. Very nice work Elif. You seem to have a fascination with this red liquid in a couple of your stories :-)

    ReplyDelete